Q: “My husband abuses alcohol during the holiday season. When I say something, he calls me a scrooge. What should I do?”

A: Your question is timely. Alcohol abuse often increases during the holidays. Usually, it’s related to coping with uncomfortable settings and situations that we don’t deal with the rest of the year.

Holidays can be stressful for many reasons. Some of these are past disappointments, death of family members, overspending, and unrealistic time demands. But coping with the “holiday blues” by increasing alcohol consumption usually results in avoiding real solutions and possibly adding new problems.
Two important issues are how your husband has behaved in the past, and if he drives after drinking. Drinking and driving can result in serious problems. It is best to follow the designated driver plan so that a nondrinker controls the car keys.

If your husband has a pattern of embarrassing or inappropriate behavior, a frank discussion of your needs and expectations and a reminder of his past incidents are in order. This should be done in a caring but firm manner. If you need help addressing this with him, consider arranging a couples’ counseling session with an Employee Assistance Program counselor.

Limiting alcohol in your home and providing alternative drinks and food are in order. If your husband calls you a scrooge, you can choose not to participate in risky activities with him. If alcohol is abused regularly or a pattern of binge abuse is evident, seek guidance.

Tips for avoiding alcohol-related problems during the holidays:

• Resist the pressure to serve alcohol or drink alcohol at every event.
• Place nonalcoholic drinks in a prominent place. Offer guests non-alcoholic drinks.
• Decide on a designated nondrinking driver and stick to it.
• Decide in advance to limit alcohol consumption.
• Consider having a no-alcohol party.
• Stop serving alcohol 90 minutes before the party’s end.
• Call a taxi for a friend.
• Take the keys from anyone who drinks and insists on driving.
• Your EAP can help. Call (713) 866-4242 for an appointment. The counseling is free and confidential.